Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 ESV
The funny thing about us humans is that we want people to do what we want them to do when we want them to do it. This applies even to people that we don’t know. For example, in traffic we want someone to conduct themselves the way we think they should. And of course, this pretty much goes for all situations.
What we have learned though, is that opposites attract. Generally two people who are just alike don’t get along that well. Now I think this is proof that God has a great sense of humor. We want people to be just like us, but when they are we can’t get along with them. That’s very interesting isn’t it?
Our scripture passage tells us to be kind to one another and to be tenderhearted. It tells us to forgive one another just as God forgives us. In Matthew 6:15, we are told that if we don’t forgive others, God will not forgive us. Now this doesn’t mean that we begrudgingly forgive someone just so that we can be forgiven. It means that we forgive them in love as Christ loves us and forgives us.
Where the problem comes in is that if someone is not like us or like we think they should be, we tend to not be so tenderhearted towards them. At times we can be downright intolerant or even mean and ugly.
The Bible instructs us to do some things that goes against what the flesh wants to do. Our flesh tells us that we just can’t do these things and our pride (which God hates by the way, Proverbs 8:13) tells us that we just won’t do these things. Some of these things are loving your enemy. Nobody wants to love their enemy, there is a reason that they are called your enemy, right? But that’s what God tells us to do in Matthew 5:44. And it goes on to say to pray for those that persecute you. Now this doesn’t mean to pray that bad things will happen to them or that they will suffer. This means to earnestly pray that they will turn toward God. Pray that they will be filled with the Holy Spirit. Because if this happens and you are truly a Christian, then they will no longer be your enemy, right? The other thing that happens when you pray for someone is that it softens your heart towards them. Now I have experienced this and if you have to be around that person and they continually offend you, then yes you will be angered all over again, but you pray again. Realize that your enemy is the devil who is working through this person. God is much stronger than the devil and He will take care of this.
If the devil can make you look and talk and act more like him than like Christ, he wins. When we hold on to anger and bitterness, and refuse to forgive, we begin walking and talking more like the devil. We know that the Bible tells us to be imitators of Christ (Ephesians 5:1).
The thing with Christianity is that it’s not a part-time hobby, it’s a full-time, 24/7 on call occupation. If you are living with one foot in the church and the rest of your body in the world, no good is going to come of this. I know, I tried that off and on for years. My yo-yo Christianity just didn’t cut it. It left way too many doors open for the devil to come in and when he did, he was very destructive.
We are told in Matthew 6:33 that if we put God first and focus on Him that He will take care of everything we need. This includes helping us to do the hard stuff like forgiving those who have offended us and loving our enemies and praying for those that persecute us.
I have seen a number of people go to church every Sunday with hearts filled with so much anger, bitterness, and unforgiveness that there is no room left for love and tenderheartedness. My heart goes out to them. My friend if you are trapped in the bondage of unforgiveness, hatred, anger and bitterness there is a way out. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life (John 14:6). Turn to Him and ask Him to help you to get rid of all that and to fill you with His Holy Spirit. When we imitate Christ we feel so much better.
Don’t just take my word for it, try it for yourself.
Have a great day!