Pay close attention to your life and your teaching; persevere in these things, for by doing this you will save both yourself and your hearers.  1 Timothy 4:16 HCSB

We know that a drowning man must first save himself, right? I talked the other day about judging others. I was painfully convicted of how I judge others when they don’t live the way I think they should. But, you know, truth be told, I don’t always live the way I should either. I’m not always patient, loving, kind, and compassionate.  I try to be, I want to be, but sometimes I fail.

Now, sadly, when I fail then the devil begins to try to convince me that if this person would change and do things the right way, we could have a better relationship.  I can’t control that person, but I can control myself. I can bring about positive change in myself.  I can model the kind of behavior that I would like to see in them.  I can show them Christian love.  I can exhibit the fruit of the Spirit, gentleness, patience, kindness, self-control, love, joy, peace, faithfulness (Galatians 5:22).
Let’s face it, you can’t model the fruits of the Spirit to them or anyone else when you are full of anger, bitterness and wrath.

If you want to see others come to Christ, then you must show them what a life lived with the Holy Spirit in your heart truly looks like.  They have the world to show them what deception, anger, malice, bitterness, and wrath looks like. My pastor often says that we may be the only bible that some people will ever read. Just like our scripture says in Matthew 7:3, if I have a log in my eye, how can I remove a speck from my brother’s eye?

True story, I have actually known people that considered themselves to be such “good” Christians that they looked down their nose at the rest of us.  That kind of attitude isn’t going to bring anyone to Christ, just sayin’. I want you to consider something, very carefully. If we are not leading others to Christ, then there is a good chance that we are a stumbling block for them.  Think about this one for a minute.  You and the way you speak and the way you live your life will either bring others to Christ or drive them away from Him.  Romans 13:14 tells us that we are not to judge others, nor should we become a stumbling block or a hindrance for them. Luke 17:1-2 tells us that for anyone who becomes a stumbling block or causes others to sin that it would be better for a millstone to be tied around their neck and for them to be thrown into the sea.

So first of all, save yourself.  Turn to God, give Him any bad behavior or speech that you have and trust Him to help you do better. Ask Him to fill you with His Holy Spirit and help you to overcome temptation.  Read your Bible and get a word from God each and every day.  Pray continually (1 Thessalonians 5:17), consider Him in all that you do.  Live your life, every area of it, in a way that pleases Him and brings honor and glory to Him. Once you have that under control, then you are able to help others to do the same.

If you are in a relationship with someone that you think needs to change the way they think, act, or behave, stop. Take a good look at yourself.  Are you modelling Christian love?  Are you guiding them toward the Lord with your words and your actions? If not, now is as good a time as any to start.

Have a great day!