Do not rely on a friend; don’t trust a close companion. Seal your mouth from the woman who lies in your arms. Surely a son considers his father a fool, a daughter oppresses her mother, and a daughter-in-law is against her mother-in-law; a man’s enemies are the men of his own household.
But I will look to the LORD; I will wait for the God of my salvation. My God will hear me.     Micah 7:5-7 HCSB

Many years ago, I struggled with forgiveness and trust. I realized I could forgive people who had hurt me but there were those who had hurt me over and over and I simply realized I could not trust these people. I was confusing forgiveness with trust and acceptance.

I thought I had to accept someone for who they were and go on. It troubled me so I went to my pastor for some guidance. He knew the situation I was facing with this one person. I told him I could forgive them but didn’t trust them.

He told me the Bible says I have to forgive but it does not say I have to trust in a person. Proverbs 3:5 tells us we must trust in the LORD with all our heart and not rely on our own understanding. We can trust God because He won’t let us down.

If we submit to Him and surrender to His will, we will want what He wants for our lives. We will be on the same page, so to speak.

I have recently been asked to trust someone who has repeatedly caused problems for me and many others. I am sure I will be judged by some as being unforgiving. I have forgiven this person. I have no ill will towards this person. I wish them the best. I just know that I can’t trust them. I know this because of their proven track record.

I’m writing these words today knowing that my accusers will probably never read them, but perhaps they will be of benefit to some of you who do. When trust is broken, it must be rebuilt. The only way it can be restored is by a proven record of right actions.

When someone breaks your trust and you give them numerous chances, yet they continue to break it over and over again, they simply can’t be trusted.

For the Christians reading this, I want to alleviate your guilt if you have come up against someone perhaps even a family member you cannot trust. The Bible very clearly tells us we cannot put our trust in man.

Psalm 118:8 says it is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man. Proverbs 3:5 tells us to trust in the LORD and not even rely on or trust in our own understanding. Jeremiah 17:5 says the man who trusts in man is cursed. Jeremiah 17:7 says the man who trusts in the LORD is blessed.

If you are judging someone because they say they have forgiven but cannot trust you or someone else, please understand that we can forgive without trusting. The Bible commands us to forgive. This eases a burden on our heart. This frees us from bitterness, anger and the pain of betrayal.

Please understand the Bible does not command us to trust in man. In fact, it warns us of the dangers of doing so.

I wanted to share this with you today to give you a sword of the Spirit to wield if you are being accused of unforgiveness because you no longer trust someone.

I also wanted those who accuse to understand the difference between forgiveness and trust.

As Christians, we are to put all our trust in the LORD. He is faithful. He wants what is best for us and will never let us down. We may go through hard times, but He will walk us through the fire and the flame.

Putting our trust in man is risky at best. Trust God to give you wisdom and discernment in all your relationships. Ask God to bless your relationships. Find good Christians friends who know how to love like Jesus loves. Find a church family that will surround you with brotherly love in hard times.

Forgive freely but pray for discernment when it comes to trusting others.

Have a great day!